The No Spend Weekend

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In the last few years, there have been a number of high-profile proponents of the full-on, no- holds-barred shopping ban.

A whole year of buying nothing

One of the most well-known is Cait Flanders who wrote about her year of buying nothing in her best-selling memoir, The Year of Less. I discussed Cait’s book when I compared the idea of a shopping ban to a written budget in a previous blog post here.

Writer Ann Patchett also had a year of no spending, which she wrote about in The New York TimesPatchett’s year without shopping enabled her to learn to live with “…the startling abundance that had become glaringly obvious when I stopped trying to get more.” She realised that she already had more than enough and was startled to realise how much time she could save by not actually shopping at all.

A shopping ban can be a really useful way to curb your spending, whilst helping you appreciate what you already have. If you’re paying down your debt Dave Ramsey style, it’s also an excellent way to throw extra money at Baby Step 2.

The “Allowed” list

When you decide to instigate a shopping ban, it helps to devise a set of rules. London-based journalist, Michelle McGagh, bought nothing in a 12 month period: no coffee, no cinema, no clothes and even no transport costs. She pressed her bicycle into service and lived on next to nothing for an entire year.

Writer Gretchen Rubin famously abstains from eating carbohydrates; if she doesn’t eat carbs, she doesn’t have to think about them. A little bit of something in moderation isn’t her style.

So, if you go down the road of a complete ban, you decide your own rules in terms of what is permissible and what is banned from your spending list. 

All or nothing

If you’re someone who needs to take an ‘all or nothing’ approach, a shopping ban might help if you’re trying to be more intentional with your spending.

If you can’t go out shopping without returning home laden with bags of merchandise you hadn’t planned to buy, the ‘all or nothing’ approach might be beneficial. Even better, by announcing your intention, you can also get accountability for your goals: your supporters will spur you on and help keep you on track.

What goes on your essential list is up to you, but it may provide a structured framework to your shopping ban if you decide to give it a go. Cait Flanders decided to allow herself to buy some useful (and very practical) things, including  – in the second year of her experiment – replacement items, essential toiletries and gifts for others.

No spend drawbacks

Initiating a shopping ban for such a lengthy time might bring some drawbacks, however, as Cait discovered during her year of less.

For example, so-called well-meaning ‘friends’ would try and tempt Cait to buy something she didn’t need, or which wasn’t on The Approved List. They reasoned that ‘she deserved it’ or that a little retail therapy was no bad thing. In fact, this was tantamount to offering a reformed smoker a cigarette, a dieter a wedge of chocolate fudge cake, or an alcoholic ‘just one’ drink. Happily for her, a handful of true friends were on hand to help keep Cait on track.

Another potential drawback of a shopping ban is that you also have to deal with situations that could send you off course. That is, if you’re working to achieve a specific financial goal, you’d need to avoid putting yourself in situations where you might blow your budget. For an abstainer, it has to be all or nothing.

As Cait writes, “The toughest part… was having to confront my triggers and change my reaction to them. It always felt like the minute I forgot about the shopping ban was the same minute I felt like shopping again.”

The no spend weekend

Is there another way, though?

You could try a ‘No Spend Day’ where you literally spend nothing, apart from essentials that are already in your budget. That may be relatively easy to do. But many of us, like me, are at their most spendthrift at the weekend.

As Hilly Janes admits in her book Latte or Cappuccino: 125 Decisions That Will Change Your Life, “We spend all week earning our crust so there’s nothing like a bit of retail therapy at the weekend to make those hours spent toiling at work seem worthwhile.”

Even if you’re not buying ‘stuff’ it’s still possible to fritter away your hard-earned cash if you’re not being intentional. So, I propose a ‘No Spend Weekend’ (which has a nice ring to it).

What happens on a ‘spendy’ weekend

Imagine that time period between Friday evening and Monday morning. What might you spend, if you weren’t being deliberate and intentional with your money?

At the end of a busy week, will you get dinner out or maybe purchase a meal deal from M&S or Waitrose? That’s at least £10 (or more) gone.

Saturday sees you nipping into town, where you pick up a few things you need. Oh, and there’s that coffee stop and the parking charges. Before you know it, you’ve spent a few more (tens of) pounds. You see where I’m going with this.

Sunday is probably the day when you go online at some point. It might be the day when you do your weekly food shop online or when you list things on eBay. But there’s always the risk that you’ll also ‘add to basket’ something that you see as you go about your business.

What a ‘no spend weekend’ could look like

Assuming you work a regular Monday – Friday week (sorry if you don’t), Friday evening could be a very good time to unwind at home, particularly if the weather is good and you can enjoy a meal al fresco. Historically, we always cleaned the house on a Friday evening, but have since resolved to bring this forward to Thursday, leaving Friday night for a more gentle slide into the weekend.

Saturday could therefore be a day to take things a little easier. We typically do a reasonably long dog walk, receive our online food shopping and enjoy some cooking (Enchiladas or Burritos are our favourite Saturday lunch these days). Every other week, I also volunteer with our little dog when we visit our local nursing home (we are Pets as Therapy volunteers). After all that, we usually chill out in the afternoon. See – no room for shopping!

On Sundays, my thoughts turn towards the working week. It’s great to get ahead with preparation for the days ahead but Sundays are also great for family time. And, depending on when your Sabbath falls, using a ‘no shopping on the Sabbath’ rule could support this initiative. And stay away from online shopping sites!!!

If you are going to spend

Remember that buying something or buying an experience will both give you a lift, but it’s the experience whose happy memories will stay with you long after you’ve forgotten anything you could have bought along the way. Buying something for someone else will also promote greater feelings of happiness than if you spent the money on yourself (great news if you’re not looking to bring more stuff into the home). And stick to a shopping list. That way, you’ll avoid impulse purchases.

Paying by cash is also a much better way to curb your spending. Going back to Hilly Janes’ Latte or Cappuccino, Janes reminds us that our brains register fewer negative feelings when using a card than when parting with physical cash. That’s why the envelope system for budgeting works well for people: you can literally see and feel how much you have left.

So, as you head towards this weekend (and I’m hoping you’re not going to be stuck in holiday getaway traffic this ‘frantic Friday’), will you consider a No Spend Weekend?


 

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Why summer’s a great time to declutter

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We’ve just returned from a mid-week break on the North Norfolk coast. After weeks of wall-to-wall sunshine, we drove into grey, cloudy skies and endured the coldest, windiest few days I can ever remember on holiday. Typical!

It was so chilly, we had to buy a windcheater for me and a new jacket for Mr G. Needless to say, the above photo is not from the immediate past week (it is, in fact, a picture of my beloved Kynance Cove in Cornwall).

My mum pointed out that we endured a bitterly cold seaside holiday during a sudden blast of chilly weather in the summer of 1976…. Maybe such holidays simply run in the family, then.

This weekend, I’m thawing out in balmy Warwickshire, where the temperatures are set to reach 28 degrees once again. As I have another week of annual leave before I return to the office, I’m looking forward to some time at home. That might include a sweep of the house for excess clutter….

Get your decluttering head on

Summer’s a great time to tackle unwanted stuff.

When the sun’s shining but you need to get out of the heat for a while, this is your chance to get on top of the clutter you’ve been meaning to sort out. So, head for the garage, the shed or any place in your home where you hate being when it’s cold – you’ll be glad you did come November.

Go Swiss

Pretend you’re living in an alpine resort, throw open your windows, let your duvet (comforter) hang out of the window to air and let the the breeze gently enter the room, as you tackle that cupboard or closet that you’ve been ignoring for a while. It’s great to be able to enjoy a bit of shade indoors when the weather is really hotting up and it’s amazing what you can get done in just a short space of time.

Holiday living is simple living

In our Norfolk holiday let, we enjoyed a kind of ‘tiny house living’ courtesy of Airbnb. We rented part of a converted barn in a village location comprising a living room (kitchen space, dining table and two chairs, lounge area); shower room and bedroom. It was just perfect for two (plus dog).

I often remark that, when away, we enjoy a true slice of simple living, with just a few possessions in a minimal, pared back space. So, why not live with less back at home?

On your return from vacation, it’s not unusual to see your home with fresh eyes. This is a perfect moment, then, to reappraise your stuff and capture a sense of holiday living at home.

Put the kids to work

When the kids are around, it’s a great time to encourage them to take a look at their stuff. What could they donate or give away to make room for new things? What have they outgrown that won’t see another season come the autumn?

If you’re in a part of the world where the children are due to go back to school soon, now’s also a great time to try on school uniform or everyday clothes to check what needs replacing. However, I don’t advise this at the start of the summer vacation if you’re in the UK and about to embark upon the 6-weeks holidays; children who eat and sleep have a curious habit of growing!

Beware of decluttering seasonal stuff

When decluttering in the summer, it’s all too easy to make rash decisions about out-of-season items, so beware of letting go of something that’s not in season. What you wouldn’t dream of using when it’s 30 degrees in the shade could be a godsend when the nights start to draw in. So, hold that thought as you tug at the sleeve of that old winter coat. You might just need it.

Unclutter your diet

Summer’s a wonderful time to rejuvenate and throw of the layers in other ways. I’ve just discovered Michael Greger’s The How Not to Die Cookbook, which is filled with nutritionally-charged, delicious plant based recipes. If you’re turning over a new leaf in the house, you might also want to munch a few leaves in the kitchen.

So, turn your decluttering to the kitchen, getting rid of any out-of-date staples and stocking up on the wherewithal to make some yummy new dishes. Plus, as it always takes a little longer when you’re trying out a new recipe, the summer’s a wonderful time to stick on a podcast, roll up your sleeves and prepare a light and healthy dish for everyone to enjoy.

Have a plan

And if it all seems too much, you can always retire to your garden for some…. planning and organising of the cerebral kind. It’s always good to have a plan….


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Make your stuff work for you

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I’ve just finished reading Jojo Moyes’ novel, Still Me. I was a book I thoroughly enjoyed, putting aside the other two books I am also reading to immerse myself in this wonderfully-crafted story.

The third in the Me Before You trilogy, this novel takes Moyes’ heroine, Louisa Clark, on a New York adventure (I can see another movie emanating from this one!).

As both minimalist and avid reader, I’m always on the alert for references to clutter in fiction. How do people handle it? What does it symbolise to them? Can they let go of stuff to live a life of more but with less? Is the stuff they’re holding onto serving a particular purpose?

Margot De Witt

One of Moyes’ fabulous American characters, introduced to the reader in this book, is Margot De Witt. The former editor of a fashion magazine, De Witt’s Manhattan apartment is a veritable treasure trove of immaculately preserved and cared-for clothing.

With an incredible, vast collection of vintage fashion including haute couture items, this “style queen, fashion editor extraordinaire” has held onto everything she has ever owned. As a result, her home has become a rainbow-filled walk-in wardrobe, housing a collection including even the smallest of items such as elaborate brooches, pill-box hats and boxes of buttons and braids (in case anything needs repairing).

For vintage-loving Louisa Clark – the novel’s main character – the Fifth Avenue apartment is a little bit of retro-fashion heaven.

Holding on

But why do we hold onto things that no longer fit or which seemingly have no practical purpose?

In her case, De Witt’s quasi-hoarding of decades’ worth of clothes is a way of blocking out the pain of having been separated from her son – her only child – over many years. Moyes addresses this very directly as she reveals that the character “…had built a wall, a lovely, gaudy, multi-coloured wall, to tell herself that it had all been for something.”

Making sure your stuff works for you

Your stuff really needs to work for you. That is, it needs to work on a number of levels: aesthetically, practically or even monetarily.

Remember, everything you see around you right now used to be money. When you look at it that way, you’re going to want to get the most bang for your buck. So, if your belongings are literally stuffed into a drawer and not serving any useful purpose, why hold onto them?

Letting go

In spite of having decluttered so much of my own stuff, there are still some items in my house for me to let go. My ice-cream maker, seldom used, even in summer, now needs to find a new home.

Of course, a kitchen gadget is a small item, but if you’ve been reading the blog for a while, you’ll know that I decided to let go of my car back in the winter. Going without a car has been incredibly liberating, has saved me money each month and has set me free from the burden of vehicle ownership. This reminds me of the adage that is well-rehearsed in minimalist circles: “What you own owns you.”

Investment items

Of course, there are some items you’ll keep because you may genuinely only use them once in a while. They might be investment items, such as a lovely winter coat that you’d wear over many years. Still, much of what we retain in our homes may be stuff for which we no longer have any useful purpose.

Putting your stuff to work

In Louisa Clark’s case, she is able to make Margot De Witt’s collection work for her in a professional sense. At the suggestion of the old lady, Clark is encouraged to start an enterprise hiring out her amazing outfits.

What’s interesting is that, as soon as her son reappears, De Witt walks away from her collection without so much as a backward glance. When it no longer serves a meaningful purpose, it’s so much easier to walk away.

Ask the right questions

So, take a long hard look at your stuff and ask, “Does this work for me? Could I let go of it or even monetise what I currently own?”

These questions are especially useful if you’re working to get out of debt and building your emergency fund.

You may love what you own, in which case simply enjoy it. Even minimalists have to have some belongings. So, take the advice of Margot De Witt and see your stuff for what it is: “Do with [them] what you want – keep some, sell some, whatever. But….. take pleasure in them.”

Note

Still Me is Jojo Moyes’ latest novel, published in 2018 by Penguin Random House UK. Find out more here.


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Roots and wings

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Friday saw a milestone in the life of our little family, as we attended our daughter’s Year 11 Thanksgiving Service at the senior school she has attended for the past 5 years.

On the day after the final GCSE exam, this occasion brought students, parents and staff together to acknowledge the hard work and dedication that had gone into the last few years. We also looked ahead to the future.

Marking transitions

As you can imagine, this was a pretty emotional time. Our girl is leaving a community that she has been a part of since was just 2 years, 8 months old. Starting in nursery, she went all the way through primary school and onto the senior school, still with many of the friends she has had since she was a little tot.

Focussing on the important things

What I loved about the celebration was its focus not on material success but on leading a values-driven life, full of family, laughter, good times and friendship. It wasn’t about the accumulation of possessions, which might seemingly denote success these days. Instead, it was about giving thanks for what had been given to our young people in abundance.

Of course, there was a scripture reading from The Bible (The parable of the hidden treasure and the costly pearl – Matt 13: 4-46). But we also heard three readings that I felt chimed as much with the parents as they did with the students. So, I thought I’d share them with you.

Desiderata

If you haven’t taken a moment to read this wonderful poem before, do take a look (it is repeated in full here).

Written by American writer, Max Ehrmann, in 1927 but not published until 1948, Desiderata (Latin: “desired things”) is an incredible code for life.

Even when things seem pretty bleak (and we continue to see “bleak” in the media every single day), Desiderata‘s timeless message provides a sage but simple way to look at the world, concluding with: Be Cheerful. Strive to be Happy.

Anyway

Another reading, which particularly struck me, was Anyway, which St Teresa of Calcutta reportedly had written on the wall of her home for children in Calcutta.

   People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway.

            If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

            If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.  Succeed anyway.

           If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

            What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.

            If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.

            The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.

         Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.

         In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.

Roots and Wings

This final poem was A poem to parents…. from their teenage child:

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Prom beckons

Tomorrow sees the occasion of the year, as the young people head to Warwick Castle for their Year 11 Prom. It’s a jamboree of prom dresses, tuxedos, hired stretch limousines and borrowed sports cars (not forgetting the spray tans, hair-dos and make-up).

It’s my hope that, when all the festivities are over and life returns to normal, the kids remember some of the key messages they heard in Chapel on Friday. We’ll certainly place the order of service in our daughter’s treasures box; she may not look at it immediately but maybe in the future she’ll look back, remember and smile.


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Minted or skinted?

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It’s a myth that minimalists don’t have stuff. Of course we do.

Some proponents of simple living really do exist with just a handful of belongings. But, for most of us, that’s not how we do it. Rather, we don’t buy things we don’t need; we can be ruthless when it comes to letting go of excess; and we may also be quite frugal when it comes to spending money.

Naturally, minimalists buy consumables like everyone else. What I’m interested in is getting more bang for my buck. Is is possible to find high-performing products that don’t require high-end prices? I think it is…

Fragrance

Minted?

Diptique Philosykos perfume is a gorgeous, woody fragrance, reminiscent of warm Greek evenings. It retails at £115, so is a very exclusive perfume, sold at a price likely to exceed most families’ weekly grocery budget.

Skinted!

Di Palomo’s Fig eau de parfum is a great alternative to the ‘minted’ version. Transporting you to southern European climes, this value-for-money fragrance is a lovely option. Plus, I bought a bottle recently on eBay (it cost me £14.99).

Skin care

Minted?

Dermalogica’s skin care range is world-renowned but – if I’m honest – shockingly expensive. Its Daily Microfoliant looks fabulous but it comes at a whopping £49.50. Who can afford that kind of luxury – even if it does make your skin zing and glow?

Skinted!

Here’s where St Ives Blemish Control Scrub comes in. At just £3 from my supermarket, here’s a high performing product – paraben free and 100% natural – that makes you wonder why you’d ever spend more.

Make-up

Minted?

Years ago, I suffered a great deal with my skin. A beauty therapist I visited for facials recommended Clarins’ Extra Firming Foundation. Although presented as an anti-ageing product, she actually used it on brides, as it always delivered a lovely, radiant complexion. It’s fairly pricey at £34, so I haven’t bought it for quite a while.

Skinted!

Maybelline is available everywhere on the high street at around a quarter of the price of its high-end cousin. Its Dream Satin Liquid foundation is very impressive, providing just the right amount of coverage with a range of natural shades. Currently on offer at Fabled, you begin to wonder why you’d ever buy a prestige brand again.

The maths

Of course, there are reasons why we select prestige brands. You might enjoy the customer experience of buying consumables like this in a pleasant retail environment. There’s the lovely lighting, the helpful assistants, possibly some ‘freebie’ samples, the (unnecessary but oh-so-stylish) packaging and the cute little gift bag to carry as a symbol of your purchase.

But the enjoyment can only ever be short-lived when the dopamine hit has dissolved and you’re left with an empty bank account.

Take these little examples. If I bought each of the ‘minted’ items, I’d have spent a whopping £198.50 altogether.

Even at full price (which I rarely pay) my ‘skinted’ alternatives come in at £35.99.

= Total ‘skinted’ saving £162.51.

Apply this to the rest of your consumer spending

Apply this logic to the rest of your consumer spending and you could really make some savings in your budget.

For example, swapping a supermarket’s own product for a branded one can save you quite a lot off a weekly shop. As you substitute one for the other, you’ll see the cost of your weekly shop come down quite a bit.

If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you’ll know that we shop online for our weekly groceries. It’s very easy to compare prices if you’re shopping from the comfort of your own home. Once you’ve got added of your items from your shopping list into the basket, take a closer look. You can definitely shave off a few pounds if you make a switch. Plus, the value lines offer perfectly good products at a fraction of the cost.

Of course, it’s only a bargain if you were going to buy it anyway. But being intentional with your purchases will really make a difference, especially if you have a savings goal in mind or you’re looking to get out debt.

Shopping the ‘skinted’ way will make a real difference: all of a sudden, it feels like you’ve got a pay rise.

What sort of substitutions have you found at a skinted price for consumables? Do please let us know by replying to this post, below!


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Things I would tell my 18 year old self about money

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Earlier this week, GirlGuiding UK announced that the organisation would be introducing a new Guides’ badge, aimed at improving the financial literacy of teenagers. You can read about the badge (and other new ones) here.

Since I am not aware of any aspect of the Personal Social and Health Education (PSHE) curriculum* in school that covers personal finance, I applaud the Guides for taking the initiative.

What would I tell my 18 year old self about money?

The Guides’ news got me thinking about what I’d tell my teenage self about money. I am actually 48 years old now. So, I’m 18+30, not ‘Club 18-30’. Ha!

30 years on from my coming of age, here are a few things I would tell my 18 year old self about money. I only wish I had taught myself these lessons earlier.

Always live on less than you own (and save the rest)

The 80:20 rule probably applies here. If you paid yourself 20% of your income as soon as your salary hit your bank account (and did this consistently from age 18), compound interest would do the rest.

When I spent a year in Switzerland, a fellow au-pair (Michelle) always sent cash back home for her pension. Her fantastic example was definitely one to follow. Michelle, I know you were destined to spend the rest of your life in Canada. If you’re reading this, I’d love to hear from you!

Get a rainy day fund

Grandma wasn’t wrong on this one. We all need an emergency fund and I’ve previously written about this to explain why. If you have debt and you haven’t got a ‘starter emergency fund’ then £1k is what you need while you’re paying down your debt.

If you’re debt free, then 3-6 months of expenses, stashed away in a rainy day fund, should cover most unexpected emergencies. Dear 18 year old self, if you don’t have an emergency fund, then Murphy’s Law will apply: what can go wrong will go wrong.

Yesterday, my mum told me that the source of a mysterious water leak in the parental home has finally been found. You can imagine how mum and dad felt when the kitchen floor had to come up. They’d have felt even worse if they didn’t have an Emergency Fund.

Know the power of compound interest

Interest rates move up and down over time. In my teens, interest rates were incredibly high (trebling at one point to a rate that almost crippled my parents when it came to their mortgage). Having had historically low rates in the UK for many years, borrowers have benefited over savers. Nonetheless, money invested wisely will grow and you’ll benefit from compound interest if you stick with it.

When you get the urge to splurge, distract yourself

Wait to buy whatever it is you think you need. Lie down until the feeling goes away (which it probably will). Control your impulses.

If you shop when you’re Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired, then HALT! Run a bath, take a nap, call someone on the phone. Go for a walk.

Know your triggers and if you need an accountability partner, find a friend who’ll help you stick to your goals.

In case of emergency, break glass

Make it harder to buy whatever it is you want by making your money a little less accessible. I don’t mean putting your money behind glass (although I have read that some people do this with their starter emergency fund!). I just mean putting it a little more ‘out of reach’.

If cash burns a hole in your pocket, don’t carry cash. Also beware of “wave and pay” – it’s all too easy to flourish that card and up to £30 is gone in an instant.

Be intentional with your purchases

These days, if I do need to buy something, I usually agonise over it (especially when it’s something new and not second-hand). I have to say, I bore my family as I pore over the various options before deciding on whatever it is I need.

My husband has a trick for when you do need to choose something: 1) Find something suitable. 2) Find something equally suitable. 3) Buy the second item you found. Job done!

Oh, and never pay full price. Especially for things like clothes.

Be prepared to walk away

I’m going to make a sweeping generalisation here, but I’d suggest that we Brits don’t care for negotiation when it comes to making significant purchases. We find the idea of haggling terribly awkward, even embarrassing. So, we avoid it.

That said, there have been a few times in my life when I have haggled successfully. One such time was the purchase of a new bed. I had a fixed amount to spend and I could not (and would not) go over this.

We found exactly what we wanted; an oak bed frame and memory foam mattress. The price of the two items together exceeded my budget by just under £50. So, I offered the salesman what I had. He wasn’t prepared accept my offer, so with my (then) little girl at my knee, we thanked him and headed for the exit. Just as I was pulling the door open to leave, the salesman was at my side. And we had a deal.

Second-hand is infinitely preferable

Some things must be bought new. Mattresses (see above); car seats (unless you know where they’ve come from); bicycle helmets; and riding hats (to give you a few examples) should really be bought new. However, so much of what we need can be bought second-hand. I’ve written about this extensively, so I won’t labour the point, but I really mean it.

Let go of your sense of entitlement

Just because X has Y doesn’t mean that Y is right for you. You may not be able to afford Y and that’s 100% OK.

In her book, The Overspent American: Why We Want What We Don’t Need, Juliet Schor exhorts us to “Beware prosperous referents.”

It may be that your girlfriends are remodelling their kitchens, having extensions built or are driving round in fabulous cars. Good for them. Chances are, they’ve put the home improvements on the mortgage and are paying over the odds for their vehicles through expensive car loans. Suddenly, being like them doesn’t seem such a good idea after all.

Get on a written budget

If you want to manage anything effectively, you can’t just wing it. Imagine you’re managing a project involving myriad stakeholders and various work streams. Chances are you’ll use a Gantt chart or project management tool to help you. So, why wouldn’t you do the same for your money?

My preferred ‘modus operandii’ is my dual account budget spreadsheet. I have tried apps (see My First Month with EveryDollar), but time and time again, I revert to my trusty spreadsheet. I like to see everything in one place and my Excel sheet does this just fine. Let me know if you want a copy of it!

Credit is like sex

Replying to my question on Twitter, “What would you tell your 18 year old self about money?” Tarra Jackson replied: Credit is Like Sex. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. And if you do, use protection (a budget).

Great answer, Tarra!

Better still, perform plastic surgery on your credit card. Cheaper than botox, you’ll look a whole lot healthier (financially) if you do this. This way, you can also tell your cash, “You can stay money.”

Don’t move up in house before you’ve decluttered the one you already own

One of the reasons excuses we all give when talking about moving house is that ‘we’ve outgrown our current house.’

Is it that our actual family has grown (so, we really do need more bedrooms)? Or is it that we’ve accumulated so much stuff that we need to take stock, purge and reset for the life we now live?

Only recently did we finally donate a collection of children’s books that might not otherwise have seen the light of day for some considerable time. Apply this logic to a whole house and you might save yourself a significant amount of money by not moving.

A minimalist mindset can help you win with money

Recently, I’ve been working on a short eBook on this theme: I do believe that adopting a minimalist mindset can help you with personal finance. When you stop going after things you don’t need (and let go of anything that no longer adds value), you’ll change your spending habits. And that’s something I’d love to have told my 18 year old self.

One final thing I’d definitely tell my 18 year old self is this: If you didn’t get your Girl Guide Savers badge, join as a helper and help someone else achieve hers.

*Teachers, if I’m wrong, then please do tell me. I really don’t think our 16 year old has had any such education at school, but I’m open to learning that I am mistaken.


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Authenticity over perfectionism

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As regular readers will know, I am keen to frequent my local library. So, when I found a brand new copy of Dominque Loreau’s L’art de la Simplicité there, it was a chance to discover a new take on minimalism.

French by birth, Loreau has imbibed oriental philosophies, having lived in Japan for many years. I was very interested to see what she had to say about a topic that’s been close to my heart for a long time, but I have mixed feelings about this book.

What I liked about it

As you would expect, Loreau promotes the idea that less is more. Outer order, she argues, equals inner calm. In the early part of the book, she rehearses the key tenets of minimalism: your stuff owns you; say no to clutter and embrace simplicity with style.

Loreau does a really comprehensive job, as she covers not only the outwardly visible elements of one’s life, but also the inner, personal aspects of mind, body and spirit (including one’s diet). I admire this approach, as it provides a holistic, well-rounded manifesto for someone looking to make changes.

Where she lost me

Where Loreau lost me was in her highly prescriptive approach to what we should – or shouldn’t – own.

For me, the joy of minimalism is that it’s entirely up to you as to how you approach it: what works for you may not work for me, but we can still share a minimalist mindset.

A set of rules

In particular, I was bemused when I realised how rule-driven Loreau’s philosophy was. For example, one’s bag had to have certain characteristics and should contain – amongst other things – a personalised monogrammed handkerchief! With a 16-bullet-point ‘handbag checklist’, I was left feeling a little overwhelmed and glad that my second-hand tiny cross-body bag and backpack serve me just nicely, thank you very much.

Echoes of another best-seller

The author’s didactic tone had echoes of Mireille Guiliano’s French Women Don’t Get Fat, so if you read that and liked it, you may enjoy this little book.

Even better, if you are able to enjoy this work in its original form, I suspect it may be a better read. The translation into English created a great many short sentences, which read like a series of disconnected soundbites.

Authenticity over perfectionism

What I felt most strongly was that Loreau was promoting an almost unreachable ideal. Instead of encouraging the reader to enjoy minimalism in its many different forms, she promotes her own perfectionist ideals.

This reminded me of Brené Brown’s: The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are. Personally, I’d much rather strive towards letting go of others’ ideals than to go after the perfectionism that Brown calls an “emotional shield.”

Minimalism is what ever you want it to be

During her visit to the UK, I was delighted to spend some time with the lovely Cait Flanders. Cait and I were discussing different approaches to minimalism and simple living. We resolved that, since everyone’s circumstances are unique, there simply cannot be a ‘one size fits all’ approach.

For example, scanning and letting go of physical photographs (aka The Minimalists) may be right up your street. But if you’re like me and you have around a dozen carefully-made albums (with sticky pages onto which your precious only copies sit), you’re unlikely to want to risk peeling them off the page.

My take on simple living

As you may have read in my previous post, I’ve discovered a number of ways to simplify my life. But what I found helpful may not be right for you. I would argue that, whilst we can take inspiration from those who espouse a particular philosophy, it’s always good to take a step back before we rush wholeheartedly into a new way of living.

Trying to emulate how someone else lives their minimalist lifestyle could end up becoming some form of reverse ‘keeping up with the Joneses’. Someone else’s  bid for perfection may end up being a straight-jacket for you.

Write your own prescription

Going back to Loreau’s prescription for the ideal bag, I was listening to the Happier podcast yesterday. Presenter, Liz Craft, had been on a quest to find her own ‘perfect black purse’ as part of her “18 for 2018” personal ‘to-do list.’ Listeners had helpfully sent in lots of lovely suggestions, but none of them felt right. It was only when she realised that what she had been looking at wasn’t really “her” that she fell upon exactly the right bag.

So, write your own simplicity prescription and maybe you’ll be an inspiration to others without imposing unattainable ideals. After all, being authentic is so much better than aiming for perfection.


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